So have you ever really thought about how there is a fine line between being very observant and paranoid? Oh its true. you know some times when you think "they" are talking about you... they really are. Sometimes it is your sixth sense that tells you to look in that direction and you catch two people whispering in a way or time that isn't normal. Yes they are most likely talking about you. You can either deal with it and get over it. Or you can be the paranoid one and check them on it. Oh I can assure you they will not admit to talking about you. But both parties will be thinking the same things; did she hear us?, can she really hear that good? , did I really talk loud enough?. Oh yes they will be more cautious.
So here I am in my own house on my daughter's 13th birthday party. There is two grandparents here, a sister, two friends, her dad, his girl friend, and me all here, and yet I am the only one that feels like I don't belong here. I know that is sad in a way. Ok maybe in all ways. But I am stubborn and I feel I should be here. I know she doesn't' care now if I am here or not, but maybe, just maybe in the years to come she will remember that I didn't leave. Maybe she will care someday. Maybe someday she will see how much I have done for her and the love I have for her. She means so very much to me.
Some times I just want to get out of here.....
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